Hams pain as Iceland falls

If you thought things were bad for The Hams (Tottenham) last week, imagine how The Hams (West Ham) are feeling this week. The destruction of Iceland has sent shock-waves through the whole of Europe but who would have thought those waves would even ripple the turf down at The Conservatory.

A desperate John Fuller reached an all time low in a recent press conference where he controversially suggested lifting the ban on the hooligans throwing coins at matches in what he claimed was a "taste of the good all days". Most people saw it as a money making scam.

Some of you may have noticed the lack of sponsorship on The Hams sports vests during the past couple of matches. This was another one of Fuller's attempts to raise funds by holding a silent auction for the advertising space on the shirts. The plan back-fired when Manchester United won the bid and will be putting their logo on the West Ham shirts. The players should count themselves lucky as Manchester United's original plan was to write humiliating and de-motivating messages on the Ham's shirts such as "Crap-kicks", "Missers" & "Baby-steps".

So what will happen? Well I guess we'll witness the same thing we see time and time again. The club will go into receivership, it will be bought by a member of the world's financial elite, ticket prices will go up and we'll all end up dancing like marionettes in John Fuller's puppet theatre of humiliation.